hola

everybody cries when you go to a&e with a bauble in your face
annulet:


pomfette:

i just witnessed a 12 year old punch another 12 year old for the chance to see breasts. and not just a light tap. this was a sucker punch. if these kids arent smart enough to google “hot girl tity” they arent smart enough to fake the sound of skin hitting skin. i have found my true calling. i am not going to heaven

UR FACE THOUGH IM LAUGHING TREMENDOUSLY 

annulet:

pomfette:

i just witnessed a 12 year old punch another 12 year old for the chance to see breasts. and not just a light tap. this was a sucker punch. if these kids arent smart enough to google “hot girl tity” they arent smart enough to fake the sound of skin hitting skin. i have found my true calling. i am not going to heaven

UR FACE THOUGH IM LAUGHING TREMENDOUSLY 

(via unleashthellamas)

oboebandgeek99:

heckacute:

If you put a bee in the freezer, it will get cold and fall asleep. After it’s asleep, put it in your mouth, but don’t eat it. Just let it sit there. It will get warm and wake up. Now you have a bee in your mouth.

Why the fuck would I do that

(via unleashthellamas)

perks-of-being-chinese:

when i was a kid, i asked my dad where babies came from and he said something like “ur mom had a stomach ache and she went to the bathroom n then came out with you” and i feel like thats his way of calling me a piece of shit

(Source: perks-of-being-chinese, via unleashthellamas)

rubdown:

Zayn fosters dogs. He wears a lil hat with his hair sticking out, he has a lil flat, and in his lil flat he has a lil plant. He takes dogs in and helps them out until they can find a forever home. He is not lonely. He has dogs. SO MANY DOGS. TOO MANY DOGS? No, he’s not like animal hoarder status, but a lot of dogs. They are his friends and his main source of companionship. HE HAS PEOPLE FRIENDS TOO. ECCENTRIC MAVERICK HARRY UPSTAIRS. NIALL AND LOUIS DOWN AT THE OFFICE. Sometimes he accidentally speaks to them in a baby voice, or tries to feed them, BUT ONLY BECAUSE HE HAS SO MANY DOGS. He’s not lonely. He lives alone with many dogs. HE DOESN’T NEED TO FIND SOMEONE, LOUIS. LEAVE HIM ALONE. Although - there’s this guy he runs into every evening when he’s walking his many dogs. They’ve bumped into each other so much that they’re on a first name basis. 
"Hi, Liam," Zayn says.
"Hi, Zayn," Liam says, stooping to pet each dog. "How’s it going?" 
"Pepper is moving out next week," Zayn says. "Found her a forever home." 
"Aw, well," Liam says, giving Pepper, some sort of mutt people usually skip over who likes cuddling and playing with the squeaky frog, a special pat on the head. "Good for Pepper, but I’ll be sad to see her go." 
The tenderness with which this practical stranger off the street treats Zayn’s dogs got him feeling some type of way. But he’s not lonely. He has his dogs. 

rubdown:

Zayn fosters dogs. He wears a lil hat with his hair sticking out, he has a lil flat, and in his lil flat he has a lil plant. He takes dogs in and helps them out until they can find a forever home. He is not lonely. He has dogs. SO MANY DOGS. TOO MANY DOGS? No, he’s not like animal hoarder status, but a lot of dogs. They are his friends and his main source of companionship. HE HAS PEOPLE FRIENDS TOO. ECCENTRIC MAVERICK HARRY UPSTAIRS. NIALL AND LOUIS DOWN AT THE OFFICE. Sometimes he accidentally speaks to them in a baby voice, or tries to feed them, BUT ONLY BECAUSE HE HAS SO MANY DOGS. He’s not lonely. He lives alone with many dogs. HE DOESN’T NEED TO FIND SOMEONE, LOUIS. LEAVE HIM ALONE. Although - there’s this guy he runs into every evening when he’s walking his many dogs. They’ve bumped into each other so much that they’re on a first name basis. 

"Hi, Liam," Zayn says.

"Hi, Zayn," Liam says, stooping to pet each dog. "How’s it going?" 

"Pepper is moving out next week," Zayn says. "Found her a forever home." 

"Aw, well," Liam says, giving Pepper, some sort of mutt people usually skip over who likes cuddling and playing with the squeaky frog, a special pat on the head. "Good for Pepper, but I’ll be sad to see her go." 

The tenderness with which this practical stranger off the street treats Zayn’s dogs got him feeling some type of way. But he’s not lonely. He has his dogs. 

(Source: sweethomestyle, via zayncangetsome)

annakendrickofficial:

a shout out to all the people who started saying “same” as a joke once in awhile but now use it for the most random things like a car honking their horn at another car

(via unleashthellamas)

why is anyone my friend

why is anyone my friend

I am human.
I have flaws.
I have stretch marks and fat.
I have an imperfect body.
I have acne, oily hair, and scars.
I have bitten fingers and finger nails.
I have bags under my eyes.
I have chipped teeth.
I have oily skin.
I have weird eyebrows.
I have a temper.
I have lots of problems.
I have stupid crushes.
I have weird thoughts.
I have a picky personality.
I get scared over stupid things.
I get angry over stupid things.
I hate lots of people.
I have strong emotions.
I’m anxious, nervous, and insecure.
I’m human.
I have good qualities.
I have pretty green eyes.
I have purple hair, goddammit.
I have dimples.
I have fairly straight teeth.
I have friends.
I have confidence, sometimes.
I have sarcasm.
I have creativity.
I have some warped sense of humor.
I’m human.
I have flaws and imperfections.
I have good qualities and strengths.
I am human.

why is anyone my friend

why is anyone my friend

onfirelikegasoline:

jillyoakley:

another-year-of-troyler:

gladyousaidhi:

ikkitheairbender:

mimri:

senbo-sencho:

hufflepuffnproud:

What you’ll need:

·A coin
·Clear glue
·A cheesy fanfic extract
·A pendant ring (from crafts sotres)

1. Take a paragraph from your favorite fanfic or book and print it or photocopy it. Make sure your printer is not in “Draft” mode.

2. Clean the coin completely and place it just where you want it to be, over what you want to have in the pendant.

3. Cut roughly around that specific spot. Cover the coin with glue and paste it behind the text, using the light against it to guide you.
*If your paper isn’t thick enough, you may want to paste a blank piece of paper underneath your text as a base.

4. Cut out the surplus.

5. Put just a little bit glue over the text, spread it outwars and let it dry.

6. Add a thick, thick layer of glue. This will act as the acrylic that will protect your pendant once it’s completely dry. I suggest you to let it dry overnight.
If you want to, you can add a second layer once the first one is dry. This will make it look more… real.

Finally, paste the pendant ring on the back of the coin.

Warnings:

·Try avoiding smut. You don’t want to walk around with the word “pounding” hanging from your neck, do you?
·If anyone asks about it, try not to panic and hide it underneath your shirt.
·Be prepared for  fangirling outbrusts. Just thinking that you have your OTP in your necklace may give you feels.

I’m doing this. I am doing this and it will be magnificent. 

I AM SO DOING THIS.

THIS MUST HAPPEN.
FLORIDA, PREPARE YOURSELVES FOR MY OTPs. 

Freak…

MIGHT DO THAT WITH FREAK

Do this with the hummus fic

I’m gonna do this with the hummus fic and have the words Length, Squelch and PENETRATE around my neck

(Source: fixsam, via phlying-phan)

Straight White Boy Problem #530

straightwhiteboyproblems:

One time my friend got called up to the board in math and had to answer a problem but he didn’t know the answer so he wrote ‘5318008’ on the board. Half of the class laughed and the other half of the class was like ‘what is going on I thought he had to draw a parabola’

Anonymous asked: on a football team at my school, someone was knocked into the ground, like really hard, to the point where he was like crying so his friend came up to him to help him up and of course he said "no homo" first when he grabbed his hand to help him up god bless

straightwhiteboyproblems:

Straight White Boy Problem #534

straightwhiteboyproblems:

there was a kid in my 7th grade class who wore shorts every day but he had to wear jeans one day because the weather was getting cold. he called his mom to pick him up early because he couldnt handle being seen at school in jeans. i havent seen him wear jeans since